Chapter : Valetine's Day 2012

A little late night post before I head to bed. Happy Belated Valentine’s Day everyone! This year, my Valentine’s Day was spent not only with the boyfriend but with two of our very close friends too. At first I didn’t want to make any plans because I was afraid that there would be some last minute work which I did have and thankfully I managed to complete it and rush off. 

The boyfriend and I were waiting for the J couple because James had work and only ends at 8pm so we just surf the net while waiting for them. After they arrive, we head off to look for food because knowing that everywhere would be packed with people, so we agreed to just sit wherever as long there’s food. We ended up at Sidz Pub in Bukit Damansara and we sat there for a while having our dinner before we left hunting for dessert. Though truth to be told, our dessert wasn’t dessert...we ended up in Mont Kiara for Chatime instead. 

We just sat for a while, talking and then we decided to leave. The J couple, James and Joanna have classes tomorrow while the boyfriend and I have work. But I have to wake up extra early to head to the bank with my mom. This year for the first time, the boyfriend gave me a rose! I was actually pretty surprise because in my head I thought some girl gave him the rose and then he decided to just pass it to me instead...I know, my mind works in some weird way.

Thank you to the boyfriend was the lovely dinner and flower, though I think it will die off later because I do not know how to maintain it...Happy Belated Valentine’s Day everyone, hope that you had a wonderful celebration. To me, it was way better than last year because I get to spend it with the boyfriend and close friends instead in the office working.

The lovely rose that the boyfriend gave to me.

Chapter : The Start.

The start of the year, not sure whether is it a good start or a bad start. I have been busy for my sister’s wedding, then after that Chinese New Year Celebration. Now I’m off work for a day because it’s a public holiday for people who work under the Kuala Lumpur territory. 

Not too long ago, my youngest brother flew to Brisbane to start his Year 10 there. My dad flew along too to keep an eye of him to make sure that he does his homework and stuffs like that. My mom cried buckets when he left because she is very attached to him. I don’t blame her I guess because every single day you’re with him and practically doing everything together, it’s hard to let go. Besides, when all of us (My siblings and I) left, we were in our twenties whereas my youngest brother is only fifteen when he left. The house now is currently occupied by my mom and I. It feels pretty big now when there’s only the two of us. I try to spend most of the time accompanying my mom because she’s the type who really needs a companion...though my relationship with her is not on a great level. But I will do my best somehow...

I have been thinking a lot lately, mostly on my career, need to do a fresh start before its too late. I can’t be procrastinating anymore; I need to make the first step to move forward! Hopefully I would be able to branch out from my usual work scope. From an animator to...something else, which I haven’t really thought about yet. Well, basically I hope that I would be able to get out of the office more, meet new people and able to interact with them instead of sitting in front of the computer every single day without getting any sunlight or something. 

The reason why I took so long to start making a move from my current job because I’m pretty comfortable in that company. Though we have projects with deadlines to rush but the environment there is pretty easy-going. But then I just have to force myself out from my little comfort zone and start to move up. I need to do it while I’m still “young” if I want to try out something new. Hopefully that whichever path I take I will be able to succeed. 

Growing up is never easy but everyone must face it one way or another. It’s either they start early or start later...in certain cases, never at all! Pray that this year would be a fruitful year for me. I know I will be facing a lot of hardships but if I work hard and be patient, I might be rewarded...right?

Chapter : Call Me Ahmad.

So my sister is getting married this Saturday and there are loads of things needed to be done. I took leave from work since Tuesday and only will be returning work on Wednesday, the 17th. Basically I’m her “driver” for the entire week till the wedding day itself. I brought her to do her make-up trial, pick her Australian friends up from the airport and brought them sight-seeing; send them back to the hotel, run some errands for my mom and many more. 

Attended my sister’s registration and have to wake up at 5 in the morning to get ready because my sister and I are sharing the room and there’s only one bathroom for us to share. My house is currently being occupied by my grandmother and godparents, they are here to help up with all the preparations that’s needed for the wedding.

Soon my entire relatives including nephews and nieces will be arriving and the entire house will be filled with noise and laughter. Once the wedding is over, the house will be quiet once again and my sister will officially “move” out of the house to stay with her husband. For the first time in years my sister will be able to celebrate Chinese New Year with the entire family though my dad and my youngest brother will be leaving to Australia on the 3rd day of Chinese New Year because my youngest brother will be studying there.

Then my sister and my other brother only be leaving on the 4th day of Chinese New Year and the house will only have my mom and I. It will be tough for my mom to endure the “loneliness” for a few months because she’s used to have my youngest brother around accompanying her everywhere. Hopefully my mom will finally find some hobbies to keep her occupied while I’m at work or meeting up with some friends and the boyfriend once in a while.

Till then, I will write a new post, probably slightly more detailed about the things that happened during the week of preparation to the wedding day itself. 

Who knew that there are so many things needed to be done? My dad said that it’s better to elope than to do all these preparations. He told me, “Ting, the next time when you want to get married, just elope. I will even provide the money for you. Less troublesome and I will save more!” You know, I actually thought it was a pretty decent idea, but would love to wear a wedding dress at least if I’m eloping or something. Just kidding, I will never elope..............right?

Chapter : Cooking Together for The First Time.

Yesterday was an interesting day for me because it was the first time the boyfriend and I decided to cook something together. The recipe of the day was Curry Chicken Katsu. The boyfriend prepared the Chicken Katsu while I cooked the Japanese Curry. Well, mine was an easy task to achieve whereas the boyfriend had quite a bit of steps to do...

His mom and aunt were curious to see what we were up too because according to his mom, the boyfriend rarely cooks so it was a surprise for her to see him on his own account, to go all out to prepare something and cook. He look like a little boy learning how to prepare his own meal, it was really a sight to see. Wished I could record it because he was asking his mom what to do or how to make it better that sort of thing. It was really a sight to see. 

I was watching the boyfriend marinating the chicken with pepper, salt and flour then covering it with beaten eggs and covering it with breadcrumbs then watching him frying it. He looked so serious with the task he was doing. He took the harder task from me whereas I just have to peel the potatoes and carrots and cut the onions. Then boil the potatoes and carrots until they are soft before frying them together in the pan with the onions. After frying them, then only I add water for it to boil before dunking in the instant Japanese curry paste into the broth. The only mistake I did was accidentally putting the corn starch straight into the mixture before diluting it with water. 

Everything turned out alright thought the boyfriend said that he wasn’t happy with his Chicken Katsu and hopefully next time he can make it better. Well, after all, there’s always a first time for everything. At least we can learn from our mistake and hope that we can make it better. But it was a lovely experience to cook something with the boyfriend and in hopes that we will try something else again together.

The only picture of our final masterpiece is with the boyfriend’s phone. See whether I can get the picture from him and post it up here. 

UPDATE!

The boyfriend gave me the picture of our "masterpiece". 

Chapter : Welcome the Year 2012.

New Year’s Eve 2011, I didn’t get to spend with the boyfriend. Instead I was back in my hometown because I had prayers for my late grandfather. Even though last year I did managed to spend it with the boyfriend, unfortunately, he was ill therefore he had to head back early and we didn’t get to do the countdown nor see the fireworks together. At least we managed to wish each other Happy New Year first before the clock strike 12 because we know that the lines will be jam by then. 

My New Year’s Eve was boring. There wasn’t anything to do, so I just sat at home, played some games on the iTouch and slept. When the clock struck 12, I heard fireworks, but I couldn’t see it. So I slept after that...the boyfriend called me to wish me Happy New Year but it was too noisy and he couldn’t hear me though I could hear him. The only noise I could hear in Malacca was motorcycles passing by honking.

How can I summarize up my 2011? A lot has happened within this year, a lot of sadness and happiness combined to make me the person I am today.

1. I have been working for a year.
2. I managed to complete my first freelance job.
3. Had my first vacation with the boyfriend
4. Missed out on my first group vacation with my girlfriends.
5. Planned a surprised birthday dinner for the boyfriend.
6. Had a lovely birthday celebration.
7. Spent karaoking until 4 am.
8. Met Sylvia’s boyfriend for the first time.
9. Was given a pair of white gold earrings for Christmas.
10. Made new friends and gotten closer to some of them unexpectedly.

I was never the type that would like to make New Year’s resolution because I know for a fact that I can never fulfil them. It’s like people making a resolution that they will lose weight and stuffs but never got to it in the end. I tried making some resolutions before but in the end I never get to them. Maybe I have achieved one out of the many and that’s about it. 

Let’s hope that this year would be another great year for me and to everyone else too.

Chapter : Christmas 2011

This year my Christmas was pretty...mundane. On Christmas eve, I spent my morning eating Bak Kut Teh with the family, then followed them to Subang Parade to do some shopping for my youngest brother because he’s running out of PROPER clothes. After that was a simple dinner and we went home afterwards. Then on Christmas day itself, went to church in the morning, my aunt, cousin and her husband dropped by for a visit and then we went for dinner afterwards. It was such a boring celebration for both days. Didn’t get to go to Shaun’s party after that too because it was too late so I just stayed at home and watched my Japanese dramas like a hopeless nerd. But it’s good to spend dinner with my family once in a while...I guess. 

Other than that, I got lovely Christmas presents this year, though it may not be many but its lovely nevertheless. I got a handmade item from Joey and surprisingly enough a pair of earrings from the boyfriend but it isn’t your typical ten bucks pair of earrings from any typical store but it’s from a PROPER jewelery store! Like a store that sold real gold and silvers! I was so shocked that when I received it from the boyfriend...he’s always doing things like this. 

First he will play mind tricks on you saying he will get pepper spray, steering lock or some funny items that would make you think that it would be useful but not suitable for a gift to someone. Then he will continue it for a while and it would stick inside your head thinking that he will be getting it for you. Then when the day comes he will say, “I got something for you! It’s small and cute.” And since it’s already planted in your head you automatically say, “It is pepper spray??” and he would laugh and replied, “No, I didn’t. Just wait, it’s a surprise!” Then you will start deducting what is small and cute that is sold which you would like. Then curiousity takes you over and you start to pester him what he actually bought for you but deep down you feel as though he really DID get pepper spray as a gift.

Then when you meet him you continued to pester him asking whether he got you pepper spray or a pen drive...then when he finally gave you the present and when you opened it you will be totally mind blown. Yes, that really did happen to me. I was mind blown...it’s the first time that a boyfriend gave me REAL jewelery...I mean I have received some fake earrings here and there but REAL jewelery? He’s the first. Now I feel bad for getting him a t-shirt. How in the world can I top REAL JEWELERY? I really should start planting a money tree so I could get him some mind blowing gift in the future. 

But sadly though, when he got me the present my ear-holes have closed up so I have to pierce them again. Just to wear the EARRINGS he got for me! Thank you for the lovely present my dear! I really didn’t expect that you would get me something so extravagant! And to Joey, even though you are so tight on money you still gave me an adorable Christmas gift, I love it SO MUCH! Thank you! 

Well, I hope that during the coming week I would be able to celebrate an early New Year’s Eve celebration because I wouldn’t be around on the eve of the New Year as I’m heading back to my hometown for some prayers for my late grandfather. 

Till then, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Chapter : Reaching my LIMIT.

I’m 24 years. You might think I’m all grown up having all the freedom in the world. In truth, I do not. These days I have been a big rebel. Barely seeing my own family, yes, I have been avoiding them. Why? It’s because it’s very stressful and pressurizing for me. I mean I understand that we are working and have our own little stress and stuffs but when I decide to join the family for dinner, please don’t pick on me. Please I know that you care about me but I just don’t want to be the main topic. 

For an example, a simple dinner with the family will be fine, then suddenly the mom would say whether you have done this and that for your sister’s wedding, or nagging that I’m always home late and my dad would be nagging that I never do my stretches for my back and stuffs. Yes, I know that you’re worried and stuffs but PLEASE, just leave me alone. I can’t have a PROPER conversation with any of you. For instance when I said I have a freelance job that was given by someone from work; you said what kind person is that giving freelance job. IT’S A JOB AND HE DOES IT TOO. THAT’S WHY HE GIVES IT TO ME. I’m getting paid, that’s all it matters.

I can’t hang out so late at night because I know it’s dangerous for me, but when the moment you’re having fun you just don’t know that time passes by so fast and when you look at your watch you will be shocked to see that it’s already so late. I’m always having fun with the boyfriend and my friends that I totally forget to check my cellphone for the time since I don’t wear a watch. I get told off for that. I understand, but I’m a big girl now, I know they are worried for my safety as every parent does, but are you going to be worried for me when I’m 30 years old too? I know that no matter how old I get I will always be your little girl. 

Maybe I should just leave on my own, share a room with someone. I have come to the point where I just want to do that. I never lived on my own before nor share a room with strangers. Run away and rent a place and survive with little money I have in my wallet. In my head maybe when I see my own parents less and I know when I reach home I won’t see them the next morning, I can treat them better. 

I mean, they have been leaving me alone the past few weeks but the moment a message arrive saying I have been back to my old routines and stuffs makes me upset. I barely come home at 4 in the morning these days. The latest I have been was 3 in the morning...nowadays, the latest I come home is 1 in the morning and my cousin on the other hand comes back at 2 in the morning and she DRIVES alone too. I just don’t get it. They complain that I’m not independent, but how am I supposed to be independent when you shelter me SO MUCH?

I get jealous whenever I see my friends staying over at other girlfriends’ place. I never get the chance to stay over at a girlfriend’s place spontaneously. I always have to come home. Whenever I try to ask permission to stay over at a friend’s place they would question “why do you have to go? Can’t they all come here? Why do you always have to cater to them?” I didn’t even want to say that my friends don’t feel the freedom when they are at my place. They feel UNCOMFORTABLE. I feel so bad. I mean they have stayed over before, but we can’t go ballistic and have fun like normal because they are afraid of disturbing the neighbours or my parents. So they mostly hang around in my room and sleep early and leave early the next morning. It’s sad. 

I’m reaching to a point where I really am conflicted with myself. I want to just break free from everything and just run away but deep down I know that I can never bring myself to do it because I know it will just make things worse. I just want them to understand, I’m only going to live once, if I’m going to be controlled and sheltered my entire life, I would regret in the future for never lived life to the fullest.

Have my parents forgotten that they were young once? Have they had no freedom then?